[ Her eyes linger on that last line for a little while. She doesn't know if she's all that tough, really - she tries to be, but no one knows her insecurities as well as Minako herself does.
Still, hearing it from someone else.. it's rather nice. It's nice in general that England still bothered to send her something like this despite the fact that Hong Kong left.
(It's a little weird, she ponders, how she never was close to her family back home, yet here she's had Lithuania acting like her father for the longest time and now someone else - who she has arguably not always shown her best side to to boot - is offering the same thing again.
Her eyes sting a little.)
By the time she's taken the flowers inside, she's still not sure if she'll be able to fake it good enough to actually call him, so she decides to send the guy a text instead. ]
You didn't have to go out of your way like that for me, you know. [ It's a far cry from how self-centered she tends to seem. ]
[He also hasn't been given much of a chance to learn about her yet, but because of a few things she's said he'll assume it well enough for now. Though he's also not certain if her feelings for Hong Kong were borderline "I don't know if I love him" like his was. Minako calls herself the goddess of love, but he's not convinced she 100% gets everything either, considering how she looked at his own "love" life.
The words on the text are meaningful, however, and he's not going to ruin the moment.]
I did and I always will. If you need to talk at all, I'm here. You don't need to be strong for someone who wants to call themselves your father, after all. I'll even let you cry on my shoulder, if needed.
Edited (i noticed a typo when you linked it huff) 2014-04-26 12:28 (UTC)
[ She stares at the text for a long while. It's so odd that she doesn't know how to deal with it, really. Despite the fact that she has always been acting strong, no one has actually told her to do so, it's just something she's taken upon her shoulders. Someone had to be the strong one, and so Minako figured she would just have to be that way, especially when she found out about her duty. Someone had to smile, so she would smile. Someone had to act happy and free and like an idiot to drag everyone else along, so she always did.
But she never cried in front of anyone. When she was alone, sure, maybe even a few times in her room while Artemis was there, but.. in front of her family, her friends, her fellow soldiers, her princess, even all the people here-- she never cried in front of them. She never even showed weakness, maybe aside from that night after the murders when she had felt so useless and Hong Kong had been there.
And now he's gone.
He's gone and she promised she wouldn't mind that much to him and so she doesn't, but there's still a place in her heart that stings when it's fueled by the words she reads right now. Part of her wants to accept it so badly, grab the chance with both of her hands, but she isn't sure if she even remembers how to do so by now.
Slowly one, then two teardrops drip down on the phone's display, and they make the choice for her. ]
[He doesn't know her as well as he'd like to, but he's not going to assume her family circumstances or anything like that--that would be too much. He does know what he's seen of her relationship with Hong Kong, however, and that seemed real enough to him. He doesn't expect her to maybe be curled up on the floor struggling to breathe but he knows that she will be upset. Even if she may try to hide it.
He knows his own pain, he's seen Vietnam breaking down already, too. If anything, before he grieves for himself, he wants to make sure that those he cares about will be alright first.
It's why he's out the door with his phone, keys and card before anyone has time to register him leaving. He takes the car, even if it's only 20 houses away, just in case she wants ice cream or something later. Even though he drives the entire way, however, he still looks a bit out of breath when he makes it to the door. He knocks twice, hand pressing against wood as he waits.
Open up. It's literally been only like 4 minutes.]
[ Four minutes can feel like an eternity when you're left with just you and your tags. For once Minako is glad it's not as busy around the house right now, that it's a little quiet - for as well as she can hide her feelings among the buzz of daily life, some switch in her head just turned on for the first time in a long, long while, and she can't just simply click it back. Not that easily.
When Minako opens the door, there's something a little slumped about her posture. She's angling her head so that her already fairly big bangs can hang over her eyes to obscure them from view because they're red from crying for the first time in such a long time.
She doesn't even say a word. What does she say when she can't just pretend to be her usual ditzy self, when it's too late to even cover that up?
[She doesn't need to say a word, however. It's not that he 100% understands, but he cares. Caring means you're willing to put aside your own thoughts and feelings to concentrate on another's and that's what he's going to do right now. He helps her step back inside, closing the door behind them so no one else sees, and with the other arm draws her right into a hug.]
Here we go.
[As soon as he knows the door is shut he lifts his other arm, giving her a proper hug.]
[ Her first movement is a little awkward, like she doesn't know what to do with the arms around her or the situation in general. But since she's already this close to the edge, she falls straight over it - letting her negative emotions spill out for once too. She doesn't lean on him with her full weight, but still with a good portion of it since she stops fully holding herself up and lets him support her instead.
Minako hics, and then the tears start to fall. At first softly, but then the sobbing becomes audible from her spot between his arms. ]
I.. I'm alright.. [ She doesn't know if she's trying to convince him or herself of that fact, even though it's obviously not fully true. But maybe what she's trying to say is that she's not this broken up over Hong Kong leaving - it's more a result of having seen so many people leave over time and there's only so much even Minako can carry herself all alone. ] I'm n-not sad.. [ Another hic. ]
[The hiccups and the way her body ends up slumping into him contradicts her words, but he doesn't push matters either--not too much. He rubs her back gently, keeps her close and tries to be as soothing as he can. He's not as great with words, but he's going to give it his best shot.]
[ How is she even supposed to answer that? It's not bad, but.. she's not supposed to be sad, she's supposed to be the happy and cheery one or the leader, or in either case someone who has it all together and can cheer other people up instead of dragging them down.
Still, she shakes her head against him. ]
He'd w-want me to be happy..
[ Didn't she and Hong Kong talk about that already, anyway? If one of them left, the other would be alright, so.. she can't cry now, but on the other hand, it's hard to stop now she's started. ]
[He honestly feels bad for her, and he knows what it's like to lose a loved one. Even if it's not True Love, it hurts. As a nation you lose countless of people you grow close to over time, and it doesn't get any easier. Why should it? You still care.
At least Hong Kong will be living on back home, he supposes, though for her that means she may never see him again. He doesn't voice that, and instead rubs her back slowly.]
He might do, but that doesn't mean you can't grieve first.
.. Then.. what did you do when you found out he was gone?
[ Did England grieve? Her voice shakes a little even as she asks it, but she has to admit that it's at least a little warmer and more comfortable in his arms like this. But it makes her think as well-- did England feel sad over losing his son, even if it's just for a little while? Probably less so since he can just see him again the moment he returns back home, but who even knows when that'll be.
[He quietly rests his chin on top of her head, honestly. His gaze drifts down, slowly. There's guilt there, because he knows in a way that he should be grieving more than he is. If America was in Hong Kong's place he wouldn't be functioning.
He'd be a train wreck, crashing down and taking the street with him probably.
But the guilt means he can't tell her that.]
I don't remember how to grieve in the same way as humans do, but. [A pause.] I yelled at the landlord.
[ Honestly, half of the time Minako forgets the fact that they're all countries because.. well, despite their names, they act a lot like humans do. So she's a little surprised to hear he doesn't know how to grieve like that, but then the latter part draws her attention even more.
She pulls her head back far enough to look up at him, eyes red from the tears. ]
You did..? Did he reply in any way? [ She honestly doesn't know what to think about the landlord even now, after all. And maybe this loss can give them at least one tiny useful thing.
[Pangs of sympathy surface when she looks up and he sees how red her eyes are. Enough that he reaches to his pocket for a clean handkerchief. It's pristine white, of course, with a little flower embroidery at the corner.]
Here.
[He uses that opportunity to lead her towards the couch, thinking it may be best they sit down.]
[ She accepts the handkerchief, at least, and moves to sit down next to him as she wipes her eyes with it first before proceeding to blow her nose in it as well, trying to look at least a little more dignified than she did before. ]
I didn't even know that guy could get mad. [ Not that she knows much about him at all.. but at least she's trying to sound a little bit more normal again, even though she still looks like somewhat of a mess. ]
[ If he pays enough attention, he might notice she actually does lean into the pat a little bit - just for a moment and then it's gone, but she does. ]
You mean that whole deal between you guys was real? [ One of her hands moves up to her eyes, idly rubbing at it even though it's already red as hell now. ] I thought it was just a joke we were all in on.
[ Well, at least this means she wasn't entirely wrong - despite the fact that she went along with it, she just thought it was a joke too. Minako's more aware of things than she acts like most of the time. ]
And did he actually give you more stuff? It's so impossible to get a grip on that guy and what he's thinking.. [ Like sending all these people home recently yet keeping her here. Not that she dislikes it here - quite the opposite - but the constant loss keeps stinging. ]
[ There's a small smile on her face, but there's something a little melancholic about it.
She means what she's saying though - the landlord probably wouldn't actually fall in love. He doesn't seem like the type. If anything, he just likes messing with them all, right? ]
Ah, sorry. [ Her voice is strangely unspirited.. ] Nothing against you, of course. It's more because of the way he is.
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text
Still, hearing it from someone else.. it's rather nice. It's nice in general that England still bothered to send her something like this despite the fact that Hong Kong left.
(It's a little weird, she ponders, how she never was close to her family back home, yet here she's had Lithuania acting like her father for the longest time and now someone else - who she has arguably not always shown her best side to to boot - is offering the same thing again.
Her eyes sting a little.)
By the time she's taken the flowers inside, she's still not sure if she'll be able to fake it good enough to actually call him, so she decides to send the guy a text instead. ]
You didn't have to go out of your way like that for me, you know. [ It's a far cry from how self-centered she tends to seem. ]
text - this is so late im sorry jellekins
The words on the text are meaningful, however, and he's not going to ruin the moment.]
I did and I always will. If you need to talk at all, I'm here. You don't need to be strong for someone who wants to call themselves your father, after all. I'll even let you cry on my shoulder, if needed.
how dare you i'm defriending you!!!!!
But she never cried in front of anyone. When she was alone, sure, maybe even a few times in her room while Artemis was there, but.. in front of her family, her friends, her fellow soldiers, her princess, even all the people here-- she never cried in front of them. She never even showed weakness, maybe aside from that night after the murders when she had felt so useless and Hong Kong had been there.
And now he's gone.
He's gone and she promised she wouldn't mind that much to him and so she doesn't, but there's still a place in her heart that stings when it's fueled by the words she reads right now. Part of her wants to accept it so badly, grab the chance with both of her hands, but she isn't sure if she even remembers how to do so by now.
Slowly one, then two teardrops drip down on the phone's display, and they make the choice for her. ]
please com e over
oh (lonely)
He knows his own pain, he's seen Vietnam breaking down already, too. If anything, before he grieves for himself, he wants to make sure that those he cares about will be alright first.
It's why he's out the door with his phone, keys and card before anyone has time to register him leaving. He takes the car, even if it's only 20 houses away, just in case she wants ice cream or something later. Even though he drives the entire way, however, he still looks a bit out of breath when he makes it to the door. He knocks twice, hand pressing against wood as he waits.
Open up. It's literally been only like 4 minutes.]
no i'm kidding come back spreads arms..
When Minako opens the door, there's something a little slumped about her posture. She's angling her head so that her already fairly big bangs can hang over her eyes to obscure them from view because they're red from crying for the first time in such a long time.
She doesn't even say a word. What does she say when she can't just pretend to be her usual ditzy self, when it's too late to even cover that up?
hugs /)///(
Here we go.
[As soon as he knows the door is shut he lifts his other arm, giving her a proper hug.]
no subject
Minako hics, and then the tears start to fall. At first softly, but then the sobbing becomes audible from her spot between his arms. ]
I.. I'm alright.. [ She doesn't know if she's trying to convince him or herself of that fact, even though it's obviously not fully true. But maybe what she's trying to say is that she's not this broken up over Hong Kong leaving - it's more a result of having seen so many people leave over time and there's only so much even Minako can carry herself all alone. ] I'm n-not sad.. [ Another hic. ]
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Is it really a bad thing to be?
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Still, she shakes her head against him. ]
He'd w-want me to be happy..
[ Didn't she and Hong Kong talk about that already, anyway? If one of them left, the other would be alright, so.. she can't cry now, but on the other hand, it's hard to stop now she's started. ]
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At least Hong Kong will be living on back home, he supposes, though for her that means she may never see him again. He doesn't voice that, and instead rubs her back slowly.]
He might do, but that doesn't mean you can't grieve first.
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[ Did England grieve? Her voice shakes a little even as she asks it, but she has to admit that it's at least a little warmer and more comfortable in his arms like this. But it makes her think as well-- did England feel sad over losing his son, even if it's just for a little while? Probably less so since he can just see him again the moment he returns back home, but who even knows when that'll be.
It's been years for her, after all. ]
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He'd be a train wreck, crashing down and taking the street with him probably.
But the guilt means he can't tell her that.]
I don't remember how to grieve in the same way as humans do, but. [A pause.] I yelled at the landlord.
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She pulls her head back far enough to look up at him, eyes red from the tears. ]
You did..? Did he reply in any way? [ She honestly doesn't know what to think about the landlord even now, after all. And maybe this loss can give them at least one tiny useful thing.
So it won't be for nothing. ]
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Here.
[He uses that opportunity to lead her towards the couch, thinking it may be best they sit down.]
We had a bit of an argument, actually.
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I didn't even know that guy could get mad. [ Not that she knows much about him at all.. but at least she's trying to sound a little bit more normal again, even though she still looks like somewhat of a mess. ]
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[His hand reaches to brush aside her hair, giving her a light pat on the head after.]
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You mean that whole deal between you guys was real? [ One of her hands moves up to her eyes, idly rubbing at it even though it's already red as hell now. ] I thought it was just a joke we were all in on.
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I think that depends on what you consider 'real'. I tried gaining extra things from him, but there is no strange affair going on as was joked.
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And did he actually give you more stuff? It's so impossible to get a grip on that guy and what he's thinking.. [ Like sending all these people home recently yet keeping her here. Not that she dislikes it here - quite the opposite - but the constant loss keeps stinging. ]
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[He's not going to bring up the ring that came with the photo album. Ever.]
I'm still not aware of his reasoning for it, of course.
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[ There's a small smile on her face, but there's something a little melancholic about it.
She means what she's saying though - the landlord probably wouldn't actually fall in love. He doesn't seem like the type. If anything, he just likes messing with them all, right? ]
Ah, sorry. [ Her voice is strangely unspirited.. ] Nothing against you, of course. It's more because of the way he is.