[ There may have been a lot of stuff she was possibly expecting, but this wasn't one of those things, apparently. Especially not judging from the way her eyes grow a little wider in surprise at his words. (It's rare to see Minako genuinely surprised like this.) ]
[no matter how many times he tried to rehearse that in a nice, happy voice, it still sounds like such a mean and angry thing to say. it sounds like he's saying "i'm quitting (because i'm unhappy)", which is definitely not the case.]
[it's even harder to try and explain his reasons though]
It's not because I don't like it here, it's just... I want to, do other things..? I think I want to work at the school after I graduate, and continue swimming, and learn about teaching...
[ For a moment it looks like Minako doesn't quite know what to say, although she would deny that fact to hell and back if she had to. She can only stare at Makoto, hands nervously fumbling with her necklace as she searches for words. Not like she wants to let an awkward silence linger between them, but it's just.. hard. Even for Minako, who is used to pretending and acting like it's just as easy as breathing.
They had already lost so many employees since they went home. And now even Makoto is quitting by himself..
It stings. More than anything else would.
But Minako forces herself to smile. ]
Ah, so it's like that.. [ She laughs. ] I got it, I got it! Our Makoto-kun is growing up, I totally understand!
[the acceptance seems a little too quick; he wonders if he expected minako to make a scene with waterworks, fake as she could work them out, as she tends to do with rin to mess with him. the soberness leaves him a little nervous.]
[he's making a decision for himself here, and it's a bit terrifying for him to put himself before others; that's why it shines through, this need to make sure minako is really alright with it.]
It's not that I'll stop coming over, or that we'll stop talking, or anything...
[ She quickly nods. Maybe a little bit too quickly, but Minako's not as good at completely covering up these things as she likes to assume she is, so she doesn't realise it might seem a little off. ]
It's not really going to change anything when it comes down to it, so that's why it's not a big problem, right? [ A shiver runs down her spine as she says it.
Maybe if she'll keep repeating that - it's not a problem - then she'll believe it too. Because she has to, unless she wants to be like an oversized child throwing a tantrum. ]
[makoto's smile wavers, because in something that he and minako are aline in, is that they try to cover up their shortcomings and weaknesses with smiles and thinking about the best for others; that that is enough to drown their own selfish requests.]
[he knows it's not easy, and at the moment he really has no words of comfort to offer. minako has given him so much during all this time they've worked together, and a lot of it stems from friendship and from having a family away from home.]
[so he nods at her question, even if it's not meant to be answered, and narrows the distance between them to press her into an embrace.
Thank you... for everything, Minako. This place has my favourite chocolate cupcakes, so it's not like I'm gonna just go...
No, no, no-- she had been able to bear it with that distance. It's what she always does, after all. But now he's this close, pulling her into an embrace and all. And physical contact makes it so much harder to keep up that front from before. Minako bites her lower lip, hoping it's not hard enough to make it bleed, but it sure does feel that way. But she's pretty sure it's the only way she can keep her own selfish feelings from spilling out. ]
Yeah.
[ she can even raise her arms to cling to him in return - it's like there's a hollow void in her stomach. At least she doesn't have to look him in the eyes this way - a small mercy. ]
You're not going, so.. There's no need to say "I'll miss you"..
[he hates putting things like this; like promises he ought to fulfill. but at the very least, they aren't empty, not when he offers them (which is a pretty rare occurrence).]
And I'll ask to speak with the prettiest, loveliest girl working.
[he keeps their embrace warm, feeling she must be trying to compose herself. when he does pull back, his smile is a little watery, hands around her arms, a gentle touch.]
[ She lets out a small breath, and the moment he's looking at her like that after he pulls back, her gaze drops, her head dipping a little bit too, like she's trying to obscure her expression from him. It's impossible since he's right in front of her like that, but she's still trying.
Because it hurts. It hurts, but she doesn't want to show it - isn't that just how it always is? ]
Um, actually-- [ It's probably an attempt at a small giggle, but it sounds really weak, and her hand moves through her bangs. ] Actually, I think it'd be easier if you didn't say stuff like that.. probably.
[ Because while she can usually separate business and feelings pretty well, it's harder in this case - it's harder when Makoto is someone important to her to begin with and everything gets so tangled up in her mind. ]
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Eh..? What do you mean, the last one..?
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[no matter how many times he tried to rehearse that in a nice, happy voice, it still sounds like such a mean and angry thing to say. it sounds like he's saying "i'm quitting (because i'm unhappy)", which is definitely not the case.]
[it's even harder to try and explain his reasons though]
It's not because I don't like it here, it's just... I want to, do other things..? I think I want to work at the school after I graduate, and continue swimming, and learn about teaching...
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They had already lost so many employees since they went home. And now even Makoto is quitting by himself..
It stings. More than anything else would.
But Minako forces herself to smile. ]
Ah, so it's like that.. [ She laughs. ] I got it, I got it! Our Makoto-kun is growing up, I totally understand!
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[the acceptance seems a little too quick; he wonders if he expected minako to make a scene with waterworks, fake as she could work them out, as she tends to do with rin to mess with him. the soberness leaves him a little nervous.]
[he's making a decision for himself here, and it's a bit terrifying for him to put himself before others; that's why it shines through, this need to make sure minako is really alright with it.]
It's not that I'll stop coming over, or that we'll stop talking, or anything...
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[ She quickly nods. Maybe a little bit too quickly, but Minako's not as good at completely covering up these things as she likes to assume she is, so she doesn't realise it might seem a little off. ]
It's not really going to change anything when it comes down to it, so that's why it's not a big problem, right? [ A shiver runs down her spine as she says it.
Maybe if she'll keep repeating that - it's not a problem - then she'll believe it too. Because she has to, unless she wants to be like an oversized child throwing a tantrum. ]
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[he knows it's not easy, and at the moment he really has no words of comfort to offer. minako has given him so much during all this time they've worked together, and a lot of it stems from friendship and from having a family away from home.]
[so he nods at her question, even if it's not meant to be answered, and narrows the distance between them to press her into an embrace.
Thank you... for everything, Minako. This place has my favourite chocolate cupcakes, so it's not like I'm gonna just go...
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No, no, no-- she had been able to bear it with that distance. It's what she always does, after all. But now he's this close, pulling her into an embrace and all. And physical contact makes it so much harder to keep up that front from before. Minako bites her lower lip, hoping it's not hard enough to make it bleed, but it sure does feel that way. But she's pretty sure it's the only way she can keep her own selfish feelings from spilling out. ]
Yeah.
[ she can even raise her arms to cling to him in return - it's like there's a hollow void in her stomach. At least she doesn't have to look him in the eyes this way - a small mercy. ]
You're not going, so.. There's no need to say "I'll miss you"..
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[he hates putting things like this; like promises he ought to fulfill. but at the very least, they aren't empty, not when he offers them (which is a pretty rare occurrence).]
And I'll ask to speak with the prettiest, loveliest girl working.
[he keeps their embrace warm, feeling she must be trying to compose herself. when he does pull back, his smile is a little watery, hands around her arms, a gentle touch.]
--that's you, by the way.
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Because it hurts. It hurts, but she doesn't want to show it - isn't that just how it always is? ]
Um, actually-- [ It's probably an attempt at a small giggle, but it sounds really weak, and her hand moves through her bangs. ] Actually, I think it'd be easier if you didn't say stuff like that.. probably.
[ Because while she can usually separate business and feelings pretty well, it's harder in this case - it's harder when Makoto is someone important to her to begin with and everything gets so tangled up in her mind. ]